As the NICU has become my home away from home, the nurses have become some of my new best friends. We talk about food, clothes, movies, and of course, the girls. In their own way, they offer me advice, comfort, and a warm smile that helps me make it through the day. They tell me stories of other babies that once occupied those beige walls with mint green nursery borders and how one day I will barely remember this experience because our girls will be healthy and strong. Forgetting this journey seems impossible to me now but I can see how the days can easily blur themselves into one long memory that parents don't want to replay in their minds. But, for me, I don't want to forget this experience. As painful as it may be; remembering the bad makes me appreciate the good. On Sunday, Raleigh and I started looking through some of the first pictures that we took of the girls. They were so small and had so many tubes inside of them. Looking back made us realize how great is our God. Today, our girls have grown and have both reached three pounds!!! What a miracle! They each got to wear clothes for the first time last week. I was shocked to see them with clothes on their backs. Of course, they are still huge on them but it is a step in the right direction.
God continues to amaze me with his timing. Last week was a time of healing and restoration of faith for me. Each day, I continued to accept his peace and for the first time in a long time I felt light. My burdens had been lifted to a shoulder much stronger than mine. I was actually able to enjoy my hospital visits and not be anxious while I was away. Raleigh was in a wedding this past Saturday for a dear childhood friend and the girls were doing so well that I decided to go with him. I will admit that I was still a teeny tiny bit nervous to be away from the girls but the fact that I was able to leave town for the night shows how much I trusted the Lord. Through the weekend, we ran into people that have been following our blog and it was so encouraging to us to receive their kind words. When arriving back in Montgomery, our first stop was to the NICU and we were welcomed by these faces:
Absence sure does make the heart grow fonder! Every day, the girls continue to grow and amaze me with their personalities. Adeline has started to be so alert and she is actually enjoying her pacifier. Maralee loves to be in K-care. Raleigh and I have started to read books to them at night and it is so cute to see their eyes move at the sound of our voices.
Even though the girls have made such progress, we still have a long way to go. Yesterday, Maralee received another ugly infection. Basically, she got a hospital bacteria in her blood stream. She is receiving antibiotics and the doctor assured me that it is treatable but we hate to see this setback. This is round 3 but I must say that so far I am taking it much better than I did the first two times. I am trying very hard to put my trust in God and to let him handle this infection. Somebody gave me this verse and it fits perfectly: "But I trust in you, O Lord; I say, "You are my God." My times are in your hands" (Psalm 31:14-15).
This whole journey thus far has been about me trusting God with my children and Him refining my faith. Mathew 10:8 states, "Freely you have received, freely give." God has given us so much of His love and mercy and The Uncontainable Truth is my meek attempt at sharing His grace with all of you. I want every person reading this blog to know how much God loves you. He loves YOU. He desires to have you as part of his kingdom. Once you have accepted that Christ is your ultimate Savior; He desperately longs to have a deep relationship with you.
Friends, the coolest thing about blogs and testimonies is that they inspire others. I started this because someone inspired me. If our story has inspired you, what are you going to do about it? God has a great plan for your life and He is so ready for you to let Him show it to you. The question is, will you let him?
Till next time, let your light shine!