An awakening is stirring in my heart.

To live life more fully; embracing circumstances and accepting change.

Because, don't our circumstances define our days and change is always bound to happen? I've been viewing these two things: circumstances and change all wrong. Instead of being grateful for my circumstances, I view them with wary eyes...not truly believing that good comes from all of this. Change has been ripping me to shreds instead of knitting together a new tapestry gorgeous in glory.

Yes, circumstances do define my days: when one thing goes wrong, a once bright day instantly tumbles into darkness. The tears sting and the breath becomes short. Irritability and envy catch fire in my heart. Then, to make matters worse, I want to punch change in the gut. Stop it from coming and wrecking me so. Instead of embracing my circumstances with a welcoming hug, I never come to the door. Instead of accepting change, I try to act like it doesn't exist.

But, it does. Change does exist and circumstances - good and bad - happen. That's when the stirring began to live life differently; to embrace and accept. Live awake instead of half asleep. Be full, content, and blessed.

Did you know that the word blessed actually means to be in a state of life fulfilled? To have a sense of satisfaction, contentment, fortune, and happiness? If I'm to be honest, some days I don't feel fully blessed. I know that I am but I don't live that way because I let my difficult circumstances and unsettling change alter my days. But, to fully be blessed means changing my attitude.

[pullquote_left]The Beatitudes is an attitude of becoming[/pullquote_left]Last night, our preacher led a message about the Sermon on the Mount and he said that the beatitudes is an attitude of becoming. Gosh, isn't that a lovely way to put it? The beatitudes is a guide to becoming a young woman that lives - fully lives - a life blessed with dreary circumstances and difficult change.

  • It's about believing that the sunshine is behind the clouds.
  • Or, allowing myself to deeply inhale the mighty waters' breeze when I feel unsure about the future.
  • Fully living requires laughter through the craziness, intimacy through the loneliness, and choosing to grow despite the dark soil that entraps my fledgling seed of courage.

Fully becoming requires an awakening indeed.

My heart is truly ready. The felicity of it all makes me giddy with the thoughts of how this awakening will now define my circumstances and change. How my life will be turned upside down in a very good way.

When Jesus preached on the mountain, it was symbolic of when Moses - the law giver - stood in front of God's people all those years ago. Now, Jesus was reinterpreting the law and allowing all the people - messed up people with difficult circumstances and way too much change - to have a moving of their hearts.

A moving of hearts...an awakening!

In Hays McKay's words, Jesus was giving the people a picture of the great reversal. I interpret this as he was turning their lives upside down in a very good way.

On the Sermon on the Mount Jesus tells the people to:

  • surrender control of your life and become meek...then you will be blessed
  • care deeply about others....then you will be blessed
  • recognize the struggle....then you will be blessed

This reversal of attitude about life's circumstances and change sparks my hearts' awakening. Realizing this, it's hard to go back to living each day based on emotions that burst when life doesn't go to plan. It's time to give the hugs to circumstances and greet change with a warm smile. Welcoming these things - embracing that they will not go away but only make me better - is a step to fully live life.

Blessed.

Till next time, let your light shine!

Blessings, christen

*Excerpts of the Sermon on the Mount taken from Dr. Hays McKay/Covenant United Methodist Church

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Need some hope today that better days are still to come? Check out our family's NICU video testimony...may it allow your day to shine just a little bit brighter!

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